Get Over The Guilt

This is a story about chocolate cake and guilt.  

You eat a piece of chocolate cake and it taste incredible.  Then you decide to have a few more bites, and suddenly half the cake is gone.  You start feeling guilty.  You know you should have enjoyed the one piece but you couldn't control yourself and you ate more.  Now the guilt is driving in harder and you start the OH WELL attitude.  Screw it, you say as you finish the rest of the cake.

Moments later you lay down and begin massaging your belly.  A pain swells as equally as your stomach.  Your guilt grows larger and larger.  You begin feeling bad, really bad.  And your body feels awful.  You think you are a failure; and you start asking yourself how you got here?  Was it the pressure from work?  Stress building around you?

Just as you are about to fall asleep your phone rings.  You are invited to dinner with an old, long-lost friend, who is in town for the night but you have to say no.  Not only do you feel bloated and uncomfortable, but you also feel ashamed and shrunken--amiss of proper spirit for a dear friend.  And the guilt builds.  The frustration and anger blossom.

This is a story about chocolate cake and an old friend.

You eat a piece of chocolate cake and it taste incredible.  So incredible, in fact, that you decide to have another piece of cake.  But before you do, you grab a salt shaker and begin dumping a protective barrier of salt over the rest of the cake, ruining any chance of further consumption.  You don't want to make any bad decisions and you know you will if the cake stays within a forks reach.

The next piece of cake is placed as if it is the last in the world, one island amid a vast ocean of counter-top.  You approach it with awe and reverence.  The fork fits perfectly in your hand as you break the crunch of the top and glide through the soft body, finally, dancing the fork to your mouth.  Your eyes close and your shoulders sink as the first bite hits you.  Smoothing the cake out with your tongue and chewing slowly, a guttural voice of pleasure escapes your throat.

As you approach your last bite you realize the phone has been ringing.  The heightened tasting session apparently left your ears deaf.  You race to the phone, licking your fingers, and say hello to an old, long-lost friend, who is in town for the night, and you immediately invite them over.

The door bells rings.  You open the door to your old, long-lost friend, who has another cake in hand.

...     ...     ...

 
Guilt is an emotional warning sign to recognize when we do something wrong, or do something that shouldn't be repeated. Guilt either becomes a forced transition or a descending asteroid of unhappiness.  Either we obsess and the bad feelings keep going, ultimately leading to self-destructive behavior, or we forget about perfection and take control of the controllable.

The next time you feel guilty...

Accept Your Leading Action

Acknowledge the Guilt

Learn the Lesson

Move On

and

GET OVER THE GUILT!

In The Words of George Michael

My Mamaw Dixie is the spirit of our family. 

Mamaw is always whistling songs, thanking the lord, or smiling with the greatest of love on her face.  My fondest memories include her holding a Gibson guitar close, and singing the sweetest songs from the past. 

The following video is of her on our farm.  You can hear my family around her laughing and playing.  Her love and faith are tangible in this video.




I want you to move past the word Jesus for a minute.  My Mamaw has a faith that transcends her religious tone.  A faith which encompasses pure love as a motivator to life.

Faith is life's greatest connector and motivator.  It enables us to connect trust and loyalties with others, develop a larger perspective--through those relationships, develop values and subjugate meaning to our lives, and have hope, brightening our view of the world through a positive lens.

Faith is essential to happiness.  And faith goes beyond the confines of religious thought or dogma.  Faith is an attitude or philosophy toward life.

Faith is to your self what the muscles are to the body.  
It is the thing that makes you move forward.

Developing faith is a matter of practice.  Just as you exercise the body and muscles, so must you exercise and practice your faith.

In the words of George Michael:

Loosen Up

It was a beautiful day in Sun Valley.  Every season was at display.  Lush green fields reached into leaved branches of orange, red, and gold; and just as the mountains peaked snow held firm.  And there I stood, arms swinging in large circles, with a swim cap on, and goggles smothering my eyes, looking into a pool. 

I knew I looked the part.  In fact, I had the trendiest tri-athlete swimming gear on.   My audience, 2 old men hanging their chest and arms out of a hot tub, awaited anxiously for some action, or at least something to watch as they did absolutely nothing.  

My arms relaxed and I moved my toes to the edge of the pool.

I jumped in.  Don't get confused with diving in.  That I didn't do.  I simply went feet first, splashed a ton, and came to the top of the water to wade with the greatest of difficulty.

And he is off.  I started down my swimming lane in a freestyle form.  I dropped my head and kicked and reached forward, scooping through the water, and feeling like I was moving ahead soon to touch the wall. 

I can't turn my head to breath when I swim so I kept my head down and held my breath.  The wall never came! As my air went low and I came up to look, I realized I hadn't really moved at all.  I became a hamster on a wheel but in tri-gear in a pool.

My reaction: laughter.
My audience reaction: a nose twitch and slow blink.

Two hours later I dragged my pruned body out of the pool.  I had a blast attempting to swim.  I tried it all.  And failed at most.  But I didn't allow my pride to get in the way of a little awkward fun.

Because I didn't take myself too seriously I gave myself a chance to experience something new.  No one cared a lick if I was an amazing swimmer.  However, I'm sure they did wonder at times, when I stood motionless in the water looking confused, if I was peeing in the pool.

Who cares about what you look like or what you feel like?  Allow yourself the opportunity for fun.  Worse case scenario you make someone's day by being the biggest goofball and inspiring someone else to LOOSEN UP.